Dubya’s Nightmares

Hi again!

Dubya here once more!

It’s great to be back, but I don’t feel great.

It’s 13th February, 2017, and for the past month, since before the Red-blond’s swearing-in, I’ve had nightmares and I’ve entered a state of depression that’s making me really sick.

Firstly was his choice of laudatory hymn – the overture from Alun Hoddinott’s 1981 opera, The Trumpet Major, based on Thomas Hardy’s book. I guess that’s because the big man never reads anything, let alone an historical novel. Perhaps he’d see the movie if it was called The Strumpet in A Major or maybe The Strumpet on A Major – whatever, best with one of his wives in the lead role.

And I must admit that some of the signs I saw at the protests against his presidential decrees were to the point: “America was built by immigrants” and (best of all) “2/3 of Trumps’ wives were immigrants… proving once again we need immigrants to do jobs most Americans wouldn’t do” (the placard didn’t say if they were blow jobs or tug jobs).

My nightmares… they’re all about what he’s doing – you know, the businessman-dealer – and the consequences. The immigration ban on certain people from certain countries – which federal courts threw out, which The Rump threatened to fake before the Supreme Court, before he’d secured a Republican majority there – is typical of his failure to think things through before he blusters and connives his way forwards…

My fear is what he’ll do with the man he says he admires: Vlad Putsching. While keeping Russian public opinion in his own favor through nudges and lies in the state-controlled media, this authoritarian man from St Petersburg (that’s the one in western Russia, not western Florida) rules his country with a hard hand and his reservoir dogs – maybe that’s what The Rump wants to learn how to do…

Putsching wants greater international recognition and wants to be an internationally accepted statesman working for world peace – like his backing of Bashar al-Assad as the Syrian president destroys his own country.

The Rump’ll do a deal with Putsching over nuclear arms. The Russian leader says he’ll build more nuclear missiles to regain the power balance. The US leader will then tell Putsching that the IS – oops, pardon the typo, that should’ve been the US! – will also build more nuclear missiles.

“And as you know, Vlad,” the Golden Showers boy will say during a round of golf where the Russian’s small white balls were squeezed together before they disappeared with great regularity, and he gets penalty strokes for taking new balls into play, “the last time we played this ‘mine’s bigger than yours’ game, we won, because our economy could do it, while your economy not only crashed through the floor – it led to the rise of a second-rate KGB spy to the post of president. And remember how little revenue your oil and gas sales give!”

To which Putsching replies, “Sergei Pavlov Wolf is behind me all the way on this – so watch out.”

And after The Rump finally leaves on Golden Globe 1 (renamed from Air Force 1), Vlad rings to Xi Jinping, and suggests that the People’s Republic of China’s Party General Secretary and President sells all of China’s holdings of US debts and bonds.

“That’ll teach that fatso upstart not to trust devious lions!”

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